When thinking about what shapes our decisions, we tend to think about our families and our experiences; however, one of the most crucial and overlooked influences is simply the people we call our friends. The ones we choose to surround ourselves with have a stronger impact on who we become in life than most think. Both morally and emotionally, friendships have lasting effects on the development of our habits and tendencies.

Friendships are the core of what defines our personality and behavior patterns. It is proven that friends can influence just about everything: the way we speak, think, and view the world. Over a course of time, months or even years, we unintentionally begin to mirror the attitudes and habits of those we spend the most time with. If your friends value happiness and healthiness, you are highly likely to copy and develop these traits yourself. If they are supportive and optimistic, you will probably find yourself growing to be a more confident and positive person. This is also referred to as the chameleon effect. This theory is when one unconsciously mimics another person’s behavior, such as his or her gestures or expressions.

On the contrary, these same friendships can direct us toward unhealthy patterns if unaware or blindsided by our surroundings. Peer pressure can often lead people to make choices that do not align with their true morals and values, so it is crucial to be able to recognize the difference between friends who push you to be your best version as opposed to those who pressure you into being someone you know you aren’t. Calista Nguyen (11) says, “A few years ago, I was surrounded by people I knew were not uplifting or benefiting my character. I followed their poor behavior to fit in and stay away from being judged. Looking back, I am extremely grateful I met the friends that I did now. They built me up and encouraged the positive habits that I now possess.”

Friendships also teach us imperative life skills that go far beyond high school. Through these close relationships, we develop and learn how to communicate in any environment, as well as being able to accept support. These bonds also teach us the importance of trust and loyalty, which are two qualities that are the foundation of a healthy bond, whether it be in a workplace or our personal lives. Choosing the friends who reflect similar values and inspire growth is the most important decision an individual can make; therefore, one must surround oneself with people who respect one, but also challenge one to become even better. 

All in all, we become a reflection of the people we spend the most time with and care about the most. Our friends shape our dreams and priorities, and our sense of what is truly possible. Araia Kersey (11) says, “Throughout my three years of high school and finding the perfect friends who I fit in with has changed my life in many ways. I know that my values align with me and my habits benefit my everyday routine, inspiring me to become a better person.”