Does birth order really matter? All our lives, we’ve been told that we act a certain way because of when we were born—only children are spoiled and stuck-up, the oldest is “the responsible one,” the middle child is ignored, and the youngest always gets away with everything. But is that really true? Sure, it’s fun to blame our quirks on our birth order, but maybe we’re all just unique individuals trying to survive in this crazy world.
Only Child:
In many parts of the world, only children are often stereotyped as spoiled, self-centered, or socially awkward—a perception sometimes referred to as “only child syndrome.” This term suggests that only children may have trouble sharing attention, experience loneliness, and come across as bossy or antisocial. However, not all children fit this mold. YLHS student Hasti Khodabandehlou (11) shares, “I love being an only child because I can’t imagine what it would be like with siblings.” She expresses her experience and reflects on the positives that can come with being an only child, like closer bonds with parents, more personal space, and greater freedom to grow and explore one’s identity.
Oldest:
In media, the oldest child is often portrayed as the responsible leader who carries heavy burdens and is expected to do great things. A well-known example of this is Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender. As the eldest child of Fire Lord Ozai, Zuko is under constant pressure to earn his father’s approval and restore his honor by capturing the Avatar. This intense responsibility drives much of his inner conflict and fuels his personal growth throughout the series. YLHS student Zoe Turner (11) shares, “Being the oldest child is all right, but my younger siblings always get me in trouble.” This mirrors Zuko’s relationship with his younger sister Azula, who frequently caused chaos yet rarely faced consequences, often making Zuko look like the problem. However, not all first-borns follow this pattern. In many families, parents tend to be stricter with their first child simply because it’s their first time navigating parenthood. By the time the second or third child comes along, parents usually have a better idea of what to do and what not to do.
Middle Child:
It’s a universal trope that middle children are often forgotten or overlooked, with the fact that nobody pays attention to them. An example of this is in a well-known Disney Channel show, Stuck in the Middle. Jenna Ortega’s character, Harley Diaz, embodies this stereotype as the middle child in a large family. Harley is brilliant and inventive, but her parents and siblings frequently overlook her. In one memorable episode, her entire family forgets her birthday, highlighting her sense of being forgotten. However, not all middle children experience this neglect. YLHS student Layla Radmard (11) shares a different perspective: “I can’t get away with anything at all. My parents watch over us equally.” This shows a balanced parenting approach, where attention and expectations are equally distributed among all the children, challenging the idea that middle children always slip through the cracks. By the time the second or third child arrives, parents tend to have a better sense of how to manage their kids without as much pressure, making the middle child experience much more nuanced, where, at times, it can come across as the parent not caring.
Youngest Child:
Youngest children are often stereotyped as being spoiled and getting anything they want, leading to tension with their older siblings, who may feel overlooked. A classic example of this is Stewie Griffin from Family Guy, who uses his intelligence and manipulation to get whatever he desires, often at the expense of his family. However, not all youngest children fit this mold. Serina Patel (12) disagrees with this stereotype, stating, “I never get anything I want, and I can never get away with anything.” This challenges the common belief that the youngest sibling is always the “spoiled” one. In many families, parents ensure that all siblings are treated fairly and equally, regardless of their birth order, meaning that youngest children don’t always get special treatment. Family dynamics can vary greatly, and what is often seen in media doesn’t always reflect real-life experiences.
