Weight Loss Shmeight Loss

Photo courtesy of metabolicmotivation.com. Yeah that pretty much sums it up.

Photo courtesy of metabolicmotivation.com. Yeah that pretty much sums it up.

Kevin Chiang, Photojournalist


The most frustrating part of any site is the inevitable mass-produced, overdone ad trying to get a visitor to click and buy some hocus-pocus fat fix while malware comes to pillage and loot his hard drive. You’ve all seen it. “So-and-so lost over 40 pounds on whatever! Get the secret Now!” “Scientists shocked by this one simple secret to losing fat fast!” “Real secrets to a slimmer body. What you don’t know!” Promises that if a person buys or clicks or likes, he or she will become thin as a stick, or strong as former California Governor Ah-nold when he was young. These ads and programs are ridiculous, cheap ways to get into your wallet by pulling science out the wazoo and hurting self esteem.


The claims that they are supported by “scientists,” or that the product is making “(insert official-sounding profession here) all over the country angry” is flat out aggravating. If half of this stuff even remotely worked, people would be celebrating in the streets. And if it’s so amazing, why isn’t it on the news? Oftentimes, the “doctor” who endorses the product is just an actor, or is a doctor in a field that has nothing to do with weight loss. And yet people still listen to theses things, just because someone in a doctor’s coat uses big words. It’s despicable.


Moreover, a lot of ads include a picture of some random chemical that has nothing to do with their product. The lack of actual science the people who make the products behind the ads is astounding. They’ll say something like “antioxidants improve weight loss,” and, when asked why there is no answer. In fact, their science is often taken to the point of psuedoscience, where everyday objects can magically cure you of your problems. For instance, you can use magnets to change your fat directly to muscle (this is a legitimate ad). So using the power of MAGNETISM, I can turn fat, one of the three main groups of substances in the body, and turn it into protein, the second of the three? Amazing! That’s like how alchemists used to turn lead into gold! Oh, that’s right, they didn’t. And you can’t turn fat into protein or protein into fat because they are two completely separate things.


Also, there’s the notion that you can get thin easy without eating less. If you think about it, some problems become obvious. Yeah, our ancestors could do this. Why? Because they were starving. That is what those types of ads are trying to sell you. By eating their food, which doesn’t leave you enough calories to live normally, your body is forced to use up its own store of emergency energy: fat. They’re selling you STARVATION. That is a business strategy on par with selling air or claiming that you should buy a brand of water because it has zero calories. If you do buy this, keep in mind, starvation is usually not a good thing for the body. It’s supposed to be used in times of disaster.


Now, I’m not saying all weight loss programs are complete and utter nonsense. A lot of them are, though. If you do feel like you have to buy a fitness plan, keep in mind that if something seems too good to be true, it usually is. Just think: does it make sense to me that this method is guaranteed and highly successful, even if it has not appeared on the news? You don’t really need to spend money on a fitness plan, even. Just obey the plan of “eat less, move more,” and you’d be surprised at what you’ll see.